Tanya Benzaquen has sworn off vegan men for good.
The 40-something Seattle single told The Post the final, biodegradable straw came after a snooze of a date with a low-energy herbivore who judged her for, among other things, eating eggs.
Explore More
Advertisement
While the mismatched twosome had agreed to meet for dinner, the man wound up sipping tea all evening, after scanning the menu and determining there was nothing he could eat.
“I ordered soup so I wouldn’t look like a total carnivore next to him and left the date starving,” Benzaquen said. “Since then, if I see ‘vegan’ on a dating app profile, it’s a dealbreaker.”
A sizable number of single females have had their fill of tofu nibblers. A new study on dating app dealbreakers reports that 1 in 5 women will summarily reject a man who indicates he’s a vegan on his dating profile.
The study was conducted by Alexander, also known as @Datepsych on Twitter, a behavioral and cognitive neuroscience graduate student with a passion for information gathering. He keeps his last name private, he told The Post, due to his sometimes controversial research into topics like incel culture, promiscuity and facial attractiveness.
Advertisement
For this study, Alexander collected 130 different dealbreakers from his 18,500 Twitter followers, coding them into a survey for a social media “convenience sample” — meaning easily accessible dating app users on Twitter — of 438 men and women, with a mean age of 32.
He then asked participants to imagine a dating profile with a photo they found physically attractive enough to consider accepting. (Or, in app speak, swiping right.)
Next, the respondents scored each dealbreaker from one to five, with one being something they could overlook, and five being an absolute no-no that would lead to an immediate rejection, or a swipe-left, no matter how attractive the profile photo. Alexander then shared the absolute 5/5 guaranteed dealbreakers in his report.
Advertisement
The dealbreakers with the highest percent of fives were not shockers. For example, the overwhelming majority of women say they reject male profiles that exhibit violence, or sexual and bigoted content.
Men, on the other hand, were highly unlikely to want a date with a woman who uses her dating profile to promote her OnlyFans.
But that’s where the survey responses stopped being predictable. Turns out, when it comes to dating apps, the dealbreakers are not always the ones you’d expect.
Advertisement
For instance, dealbreakers that are assumed to be so obvious they’ve become cliché, weren’t actually dealbreakers for most singles.
Only 8% of men reject women with tattoos; meanwhile, just 10% of women reject men who triumphantly pose with a fish they caught (even though these “bass-anovas” have been mocked online).
Alexander told The Post he was also surprised that only 17% of women will reject a shirtless man. And “hat-fishing,” or men who wear hats in all their photos presumably to hide a bald head, is rejected by only 5% of women.
He was also found it interesting to discover the asymmetry between the sexes when it came to dating people with kids. This was the third most popular dealbreaker for men, with nearly half (45%) of men rejecting single moms, while only about a quarter (27%) of women would reject a single dad.
Another big red flag for guys? Over half (53%) of men reject women who feel the need to lead off with a laundry list of things they don’t want in a mate — without being able to articulate what they do want.
Dimitri Theoharatos, a 30-year-old New Yorker, told The Post it signals “an entitled, borderline narcissistic expectation” that the woman’s potential partner must meet her specific criteria, while assuming the men are automatically into her.
Advertisement
But men should be very mindful of the vibes they give off too, the survey revealed.
Nearly two-thirds (62%) of women will flat-out reject a negatively framed profile.
“I prefer to focus on the positives in life and want a partner who does the same,” said Julie Griggs, 31, co-founder of Fourplay Social, a social app for singles based in New York.
Advertisement
And guys, do yourselves a favor — double-check your bio for mistakes, as poor grammar is a dealbreaker for nearly a quarter (22%) of women.
Men are also taking a big risk by including a pic with a bunch of women; nearly 1 in 5 women will immediately swipe left.
The same number of women will also reject male profiles with filtered pics.
“The more filters someone uses on their pictures, the less secure they are with themselves,” said Trista Halland, 32, a North Dakotan who dates both men and women. “If I see more than one filtered photo, they’re out.”
Advertisement
As for the single ladies, be careful what you wish for — at least out loud.
Women who include height requirements turn off one-third of men, including guys who meet their standards.
“Why would I want to date a woman who judges people for things they can’t control?” said David Friedman, a single 40-something living in the NYC suburbs.
Advertisement
Alexander said the most controversial dealbreaker was septum piercings on women.
“It looks like an animal snout,” said Nick Grant, a 35-year-old single from Arizona. He’s among the 1 in 5 men who say it’s an absolute turnoff.
Excessive makeup is also a dealbreaker for 16% of men.
“Photos where the woman looks almost plastic give off a ‘catfish vibe,'” said Ryan, a 35-year-old New Hampshire single, referring to fake profiles.
It’s no wonder men like Ryan are on high alert — Pew Research reports that 63% of men under age 50 believe they’ve encountered scammers on dating sites and apps.
And finally, more than a quarter of singles of both sexes agreed that listing one’s preferred pronouns — even in blue states — was bad news.
Daniel, a 30-year-old New Yorker who boasts a high match rate on the apps, told The Post that a woman who lists her preferred pronouns “is probably aligned with woke ideologies and we won’t get along.”
Adrijana Rozenberg, a single 29-year-old in Los Angeles, takes it one step further.
“Men who lead with questionable preferred pronouns like ‘he/him/they/them’ probably need therapy more than a date,” she said.
Still, the pronouners, vegans, ladies who love their nose rings and guys who don’t like women who hate short men shouldn’t be overly concerned, Alexander told The Post. While one trait may be a dealbreaker for 80% of singles, it just may be the very thing 20% of singles are looking for in a mate.
And if all else fails, maybe consider taking a break from the apps. Alexander and his long-time girlfriend met the old-fashioned way — at a salsa dance class.
Melanie Notkin is the author of Otherhood: Modern Women Finding a New Kind of Happiness.
